Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You probably don't remember this but last night I bought you a lap dance from a stripper that had nipples that looked like runny eggs....you're welcome.
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
Do you remember me making bird noises at the bartender with some guy at the bar last night?
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
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