Just met a synchronized swimmer, can you imagine the things she could do in the water
Legs for days
Harpoon that
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
Randomize
