so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
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