ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
He looked me in the chest and said "I think I was visited by the titty fairy last night"
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
Need to stop getting stoned with this chick, I keep waking up covered in pizza sauce
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
This must be what defeat feels like to Tom Brady today. I bet he wishes he could barf up all of his bad decisions from yesterday, too.
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
Randomize
