New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
Omg just woke up. 6am. random apartment. broad daylight. bunch of ppl doin coke around me. Theres a bridge nearby. I think my dentist is down the block. Oof.
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
One day I'm gonna have to send my roommate a "sorry I got high and forgot you were in the room and masturbated next to you" fruit basket
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
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