Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
Status: mom bitching about grandma not shutting the fuck up, while not shutting the fuck up. Dear Jesus give me strength or more bourbon.
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
Randomize
