I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
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