this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
Bubblewrap condoms. We can steal Ziplock's new slogan. Protection you can hear.
I feel compelled to tell you that I woke up this morning and found an entire corn on the cob in my purse. Ive decided not to question my drunken behavior anymore, and to just accept it as my lifestyle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
I was so drunk that I didn't realize he was staying at the Waldorf. I walk of shamed the Astoria, do you even know what this means?
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid.
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
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