I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
You do realize it's a Tuesday, right?
You do realize I stopped giving a fuck about calendars when I was 10, right? And besides, it could be the best Tuesday of your life.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
be right there i have to get my cape
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
Randomize
