he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
Randomize
