you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
Is a Chipotle burrito an acceptable "sorry I ran over your cat" gift?
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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