She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
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