Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
My dad found me naked curled up under a towel on the couch with a fucking tub of butter and a spoon. Ambien Mondays are dead
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
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