; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
Why can't burritos get me drunk
I just tried to pass the bowl to my dog for 2 minutes before I remembered she isn't human. It is 7:27 am.
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
things i am: 1) still drunk 2) still wearing my leopard onesie 3) still gonna make my 9am lecture despite the odds CAN I GET A HIGH FIVE
Randomize
