nut hugger
hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
Will you come get her? She's trying to get the pizza guy into the bathtub.
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
Sometimes the gods of alcohol choose to take you on a mysterious journey and you just have to go with it
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
Woke up at 8am and asked if she had coffee.... She handed me a shot of tequila...
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
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