I must be too annoying 4 u.
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
We are all done wearing pants today
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
