I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
These 17 People Made Horrible Decisions That Ruined Their Lives
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
These 19 Teachers Had Very Inappropriate Interactions With Students
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
I just sucked dick on a ferry