Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
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just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
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Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
So basically, I've just woken up in another random bed and I go to get my pants and he's wearing them. Like my underwear is in them... What the fuck is wrong with my life?
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night