Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
My night just got really weird. In a sit down stall bathroom at this nice resturaunt and this guy walks in as I rip a humongous porcelain-splitting fart. Well, I hear him stop for a second. He then opens the door to the stall next to mine, sits down and says, "player two has entered the game."
Did you win?
It's ok, I did squats with my bottle of wine before I opened it. That counts as the gym since I won't be getting there haha
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
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