just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
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