whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number
omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
If I got to choose how I die, it would be in an Olympic sized pool of gin and tonic.
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
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