we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
There's not really an emoticon that says "I'm sorry I honked your boobs, and that you weren't a fan of that."
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
"Offered to eat Froot Loops out of my belly button" drunk. Thats how drunk.
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