Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
Highlight of the day: got a bunch of drunks to sing baby shark.
Randomize