i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
Randomize