you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
Randomize
