im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
I just walked into the kitchen and my dad was having this uber serious convo
With himself
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
I just hip-checked Santa and stole his cab.
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
Randomize
