$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
I was relieved after I found the unopened condom in my pocket. Then I found the open one in the other pocket..
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
Randomize
