I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
Do you know how when animals have surgery they put those cones around their heads so they can't lick their wounds so they can heal? I think someone should invent that for human emotions.
This guy just came in and told me how he bought a clock for his cat so his cat can know when he's coming home...
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
I'll pick you up. Avoid slightly awkward no-we're-not-dating-but-I'm-still-screwing-your-son-after-2-years parental run-ins.
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
yeah, you could tell they werent used to the strange things that i say. they were all outright shocked when i told one guy i hoped someone kidnapped him and stretched his dickhole over a fire hydrant
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