im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
His phone started ringing when we were pulled over and he said 'hold on, this is most likely more important than you', proceeded to answer it and agree to work sunday, then hung up, looked at the cop and told him to continue.
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
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