Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
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It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
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I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
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