____ banged a stripper...well technically she's now a hooker...
Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
My dog fell asleep in his puke last night. He's only 5 weeks old and has more in common with my friends than I do.
Some milfs here doing some blow
25 People Share How They Got Out Of Their Longest Dry Spell
vagina is talking i cant
Just tried to chase Captain Morgan with water...this whole drinking alone business is getting harder to do.
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
21 People Confess Their Craziest Online Dating Experience
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
Just ate tuna on a frozen waffle because we were out of bread.
This is why you don't have nice things.
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.