she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
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