Life is so much better after having sex.
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
I have grass duct taped all over my body
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
Randomize
