Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
Thanks for your faith in my ability to stay sober while writing final essays. It's...unearned.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
Just woke up to the cat unconscious on my stomach, his face between my tits, purring to bring down the walls. I'm endeared and horrified at the same time.
Randomize
