Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
I sent him a bunch of texts telling him that his beard wasn't long enough yet so we couldn't fuck and to text me back in a few hours if it had.
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
I wanted sex but got Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, instead. Then I had to drive 30 minutes home wet. Worst booty call, ever.
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
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