Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
Found: medium sized pair of mens pants tucked inside my purse w/ a dry cleaners coupon in left pocket. Call if you wish to claim the coupon
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
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