Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
I COULD CUT A FUCKING DIAMOND WITH MY RIGHT NIPPLE RIGHT NOW HOLY FUCK
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
