It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
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