I wish life was like the Sims. Right when you're pregnant the music would play and I would just know instead of agonizing for the next two weeks.
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
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Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
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I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
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