god I wish I could record you sometimes, you're so neurotic
I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
Randomize
