...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
Randomize
