I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
I smuggled my gin and tonic out of the bar by shoving the glass in my pocket...mistakes were inevitable.
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
He FaceTimed me fucking his new girlfriend. He was wearing a banana costume.
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well, you know. whores of a feather.
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
I’ll call you in a minute. Trying to book an AirBnB so I can finally bang the yummy guy from yoga
Your downward dog is going to rock his cock. I’m jealous
Randomize