She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
I think as far as last words to bitter ex girlfriends go, "enjoy that staph infection youre about to get in your uterus" is right up there with the best
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
Also I told several people at the bar last night that my dad the alligator wrestler died wrestling an alligator. So if anyone asks that's real.
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
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