yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
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I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
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Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
I have already put on my inside pants.
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
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