was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
So to add to headbutting the microwave while waiting for my hot pockets to cook. I apparently told both bartenders earlier in the night I was going to fuck them both. I hate black out drunk me..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
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