I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
I just recycled a years worth of liquor bottles. I can feel my alcoholic carbon footprint shrinking
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
Hey, thanks for not calling the cops when I answered the door naked, high as fuck, and covered in red velvet cake batter.
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
She started snoring post sex, so I drunkenly walked 8 miles at 4am to go fishing. Please come pick me up
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
