Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
I can't feel my tongue. And that means go. Green means go. And you know what Barney says. Green means go and woah means no. DRIIIIINKK
It's like that thing with the devil and the angel except one shoulder has orgasms and the other has stuffed crust pizza and depression.
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
Randomize
