well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
1. No more tequila 2. Why do you let me say slutty things? 3. I woke up and our apartment was covered in cake? 4. Love you
Dude you called me last night to let me listen to you piss in a cup and drink it. Just making sure you survived
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
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