Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
i hope you realize that ur overconfidence only gave me one orgasm out of all the times we had sex. that's like a 1% success rate. u might wanna rethink how amazing you are.
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
In case you're wondering what eggs stolen from an elementary school's chicken coop taste like, delicious. Delicious is what they taste like.
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
Randomize
