i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
After this weekend, all I can think about is bald eagles flying in front of fireworks and giving birth to fucking uncle sam. Also, beer.
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