Texts From Last Night

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  (916): View more from California

  I hate ducks.

  (916): View more from California

  What?

  (916): View more from California

  they're sketch. like squirrels. squirrels are sketch as fuck.

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  (916): I hate ducks. (916): What? (916): they're sketch. like squirrels. squirrels are sketch as fuck. http://tfl.nu/gesm
  Replies (55) Good night (3530) Bad night (876)
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  (214): View more from Texas

  yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning

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  (214): yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning http://tfl.nu/ufvh
  Replies (54) Good night (2068) Bad night (3952)
• Favorite

  (919): View more from North Carolina

  It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.

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  (919): It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend. http://tfl.nu/wt9b
  Replies (14) Good night (904) Bad night (5204)
• Favorite

  (410): View more from Maryland

  I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm

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  (410): I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm http://tfl.nu/u7vv
  Replies (13) Good night (2877) Bad night (788)
• Favorite

  (406): View more from Montana

  I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.

  (1-406): View more from Montana

  Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.

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  (406): I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight. (1-406): Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it. http://tfl.nu/p8t9
  Replies (10) Good night (3472) Bad night (962)
• Favorite

  (210): View more from Texas

  A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.

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  (210): A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day. http://tfl.nu/06c7
  Replies (5) Good night (2793) Bad night (769)
• Favorite

  (913): View more from Kansas

  Speaking is such a hard concept right now

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  (913): Speaking is such a hard concept right now http://tfl.nu/ohqp
  Replies (3) Good night (1600) Bad night (640)
• Favorite

  (859): View more from Kentucky

  Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket

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  (859): Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket http://tfl.nu/ka4g
  Replies (5) Good night (578) Bad night (1388)
• Favorite

  (317): View more from Indiana

  He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it

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  (317): He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it http://tfl.nu/wxzi
  Replies (4) Good night (852) Bad night (423)
• Favorite

  (630): View more from Illinois

  Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?

  (708): View more from Illinois

  Most creative movie date proposition... ever.

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  (630): Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes? (708): Most creative movie date proposition... ever. http://tfl.nu/whek
  Replies (6) Good night (1830) Bad night (1033)
• Favorite

  (224): View more from Illinois

  bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs

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  (224): bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs http://tfl.nu/2u5i
  Replies (8) Good night (772) Bad night (357)
• Favorite

  (512): View more from Texas

  You can kiss the security deposit goodbye after you and your boyfriend did donuts on his moped in the middle of the apartment. It was impressive since you were both too drunk to walk.

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  (512): You can kiss the security deposit goodbye after you and your boyfriend did donuts on his moped in the middle of the apartment. It was impressive since you were both too drunk to walk. http://tfl.nu/ypfw
  Replies (2) Good night (849) Bad night (358)
• Favorite

  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman

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  (+44): Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman http://tfl.nu/09hv
  Replies (1) Good night (853) Bad night (262)
• Favorite

  (605): View more from South Dakota

  No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.

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  (605): No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives. http://tfl.nu/8dyn
  Replies (2) Good night (364) Bad night (644)
• Favorite

  (269): View more from Michigan

  Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.

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  (269): Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had. http://tfl.nu/jcgm
  Replies (2) Good night (321) Bad night (131)

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