I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
that's the second time you've been mistaken as a prostitute. maybe life is trying to tell you something
its my fault though, i'm wearing tights
you're hiking in tights? you remind me of dennis quaid's fiance in the parent trap
i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
Randomize
